Taken Away

This afternoon I watched you climb into the backseat of Momo's van and then I watched you ride away. I know that you will only be gone for a week, but I will admit that I had tears in my eyes. I already miss you dearly and it has only been a couple of hours. Oh my how my life has changed because of you!

Tomorrow I go in for another surgery. I know that I have spent alot of time in the hospital and away from you in the past two years, but we are praying that this will be the last! It will be few months before we will know for sure, but we are confident that things will go very well.

Despite all of that, I feel the need to write you this letter. God Forbid that something were to happen to me during the operation or in Days after, I wanted to have a letter that told you what you mean in my life. If anything were to happen to me I want you to know for sure that I love you very much.

I dreamed of you before I even knew I was pregnant, before you were even a real thought in my head. The moment I found out that I was going to have a baby I cried and thanked God for my miracle. You are a miracle! I remember the day that we found out you were a boy. Daddy was so sure that you were, but not me, I didn't have a feeling either way, but when the Ultra sound tech pointed out the "parts" I immediatly started crying. Deep down I wanted a little guy, someone to be his Momma's Boy! I was never happier!

Then the day you were born. I have told you all about this, but I want you to know that I have never ever regretted the changes we made in our lives for you. I just cannot imagine my life any other way.

Now that you are talking and are understanding your feelings, you tell me that you love me all of the time. Not inresponse to anything that I say, but just out of the blue you will come up to me and say, "Mommy, I lub you!" Each and everytime you say that my heart melts even more. I don't think that anyone loves you as I do. You have lots of people that love you, but none like your Mommy!

So, child of mine, if God were to take me to live with him, you remember that you had a Mommy and that that Mommy loved you more than Life Itself! I know that I will be in heaven looking down on you and with you in every step of your life. It pains me to think that I could ever miss all of the milestones and memories that you have to come, but I will always be in your heart, always.

I have so many things that I want to teach you so I pray that I live a long long time. Really, I have a list of important things. Things that you can't learn in school and that I don't want you to learn from anyone but me. But, if I cannot teach you, I will make sure that your Daddy, Momo, Papa, MiMi, Papa John or Aunt Alexis do!

But most of all, you need to know that You are a Very special guy and you can do anything that you set your mind too. No task is beyond your reach. Never let yourself get down and think that you can't accomplish a goal or that there is anything wrong with you because there is nothing holding you back. I believe in you and know that you will serve this world well. Don't you ever let anyone tell you any different, and if they do, Don't you believe it!

Also know that Both God and Mommy are with you always. Just close your eyes and listen closely and you will hear us speak. We Love you David!

Always yours, Mommy

Another Boo Boo!

The last few weeks have been rough in the mothering department. Besides the incident with the potato and knife, we added on the broken bones! We were shopping at the mall when you tripped and fell. I was across the room and you were with Daddy. I heard a scream and instantly knew it was yours. I can tell you that my heart rate was so fast that I swear it was going to beat right out of my chest. I knew that you were in such pain and there was nothing I could do about it.

Before I had always been able to sing you a sing, kiss it, or love it away, but not these boo boos. I would have done anything to take your pain myself, but I knew that I couldn't. We got you to the Guest Services station and they called security. Security got there with the first aid equipment, but it was soon that we realized that you would need x-rays so they called a squad. Earlier that day you said you wanted to ride in an ambulence, but I know that that was not what you had in mind.

I got to ride with you to the hospital with Daddy following close behind. I tried hard to keep you busy and your mind off of the pain by pointing out all of the doors, lights, and equipment in the ambulence. While it helped some, you were also very scared. I wish that I could have found away to take that feeling away. You were a trooper though! I was so proud of you.

You were still scared and hurting when we pulled into the hospital, but luckily they gave you some motrin right away and that helped alot. You even fell asleep and slept through your x-rays!

Well, sure enough, you had broken both of the bones in your right wrist. I truly didn't think it was that bad, and man did I feel guilty for thinking that! It isn't fun being in a cast, but the best thing was that you got to pick the color. It was really neat to see you look at the color swatches and almost immediately yelling out GREEN! You wouldn't even look at the others, you wanted GREEN, so you got green.

When we got home Mommy and Daddy wanted to sign your cast but you would have nothing to do with it! It was quite funny, especially when your Daddy was finally able to write on it. You wanted it OFF, and to tell the truth, Mommy did too. Your silly Daddy wrote, "Broken Arm Sexy" across it. I was so embarrassed, but that is your Daddy!

Today I was finally able to write on it, and of course you wanted that off as well. I was bound and determined to Write that I loved you on the cast! I know, Mommies are bad sometimes aren't they?

Well, it looks like you will only need a few more weeks in the cast. I sure hope we are able to get it off! Every night when I put your Jammies on you tell me "Don't take it off Mommy!" What a silly little man you are, but you are MY silly little man and I love you VERY much!